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Dear Jude,

You’re five. Five for you means great things! Five is a bike with no training wheels, starting school, being big, earning responsibilities, more allowance! Five is growing up and trying new things! Five is the first step out of babyhood. Yep. You’re no longer a baby. You’re a boy.

 

To you, this is mostly exciting. Every once in a while you look back and realize those little shoes don’t fit you any longer and those baby toys don’t hold the same allure and you seem to get sad. Suddenly I’m Mama and he’s Dada and you’re talking all little and sweet in our laps with your boo-nigh-nigh. Curled up, holding on to those last moments of babyhood before they evaporate like a mist. We understand. And we appreciate that you honor these moments too.

 

 

Because we love watching you grow up. We love watching you learn the world, problem solving along the way, and your wonder is, well, wonderful. But we also loved the last five years. The moments when baby Jude was curled up like a little bag of rice in our arms, mewing out little newborn cries. Or when you were a mountain goat, standing on the back of the sofa, the seat of your high chair – and then you’d JUMP! knowing full well Mama or Daddy would be there to break your fall. We only missed once or twice. You were a busy little toddler boy. Loud and defiant. You’ve always been opinionated and capable of making yourself heard. You hoot, holler and howl your way through a Sunday morning, but know what? I’ve loved most everything. Because whenever things seemed tough, I would realize that in a blink it all would be in the past. So here I am at the precipice of five thinking exactly that- where did my baby go?

I guess you grabbed your sister’s hand and off you two will go together into the world. You couldn’t have a better partner. The other day you and Gigi were talking about Snowflake and Snowman, our elves. You commented to Gi that you and she have a lot in common with the elves- you’re both brother and sister AND you’re both best friends. She agreed. You have no idea how much that means to me, that you love her and she loves you so fiercely. I hope you never let go of her hand and that you’ll always take care of each other.

This year you made the connection between food intake, exercise and physical fitness. You’ve been unstoppable this winter as you worked to become agile and fast. We’ve been amazed as you grab opportunities to go out for a walk and run the obstacle course. You don’t seem quite as scared of the world now that you can navigate it better. Good for you!

This year will bring so many big changes for you. Kindergarten will begin in the fall. You’ll make your way into the world, independent for the first time. The way I see you behave in the library and in my classroom tells me that you are going to be a polite, kind and hardworking student. You are diligent with your dad in your preschool classes at home. You are going to be amazing when you have a community of kids around you! And for the first time you’ll truly get to choose your own friends and have your own plans, your own life. I’m so happy for this great, independent adventure you’re beginning, Son-shine.

I love you forever. I’ll always want to hold your hand. I’ll always have room for you on my lap. My ears will always try to listen and my heart will always try to be patient. You’re my number one boy, my only son and one of the funniest kids I know. Thank you for gracing my life with yours.
Happy birthday boyo!
Love,
Mama


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